Have you ever had the feeling that when you’re addressing some people, it seems like you’re talking to a brick wall?
Whilst with others, you get on like a house on fire!
Strange isn’t it? People are just weird (well other people anyway, we’re the normal ones).
One of the NLP observations of people is that their language patterns correspond to their physical senses. If you see what I mean.
These cunning NLP chaps realised that if you listen carefully to someone and identify their primary mode of expresing themselves, and then reply to them in the same primary mode, hey-presto, you suddenly get on much better. Now you’re both speaking the same language.
We use our five senses to experience and to express ourselves in this world.
Here’s a guide on the main characteristics of our sensory representational systems, as developed in NLP.
When someone’s primary representational system is visual, they often use the following types of phrases in their speech:
I can plainly see what the problem is.
She’s pretty as a picture.
It appears to me as if you’re starting to get this.
Looks like I’d better move on.
Visual people tend to be very dynamic and exaggerated in their gestures. They frequently look up, as they often think in pictures. They are often attentive to appearance.
For their primary representational system, auditory people will often use phrases such as:
I’m getting the message loud and clear.
She voiced her opinion.
That rings a bell.
We’re really tuned into this now.
They are a bit more moderate in their gestures, and frequently talk to themselves. They are deliberate and exacting in their spoken words and very attentive to speech, and the quality of sounds and word sounds.
Here their primary representational system gets to grips with things, and they will often use such phrases as:
We need a firm foundation before we move forward with this.
She’s rather hot headed.
We’re getting the drift of your argument.
Some say he’s a smooth operator.
These people tend to be slower movers. Touching or doing things gets them going. They often rely on a gut feeling to know what to do.
We have other senses of course. You could nose around the internet if you don’t like the smell of this NLP stuff and see what others have to say.
Afterall, there may be some juicy articles out there which you can feast your eyes on.
If you like what you’ve heard and would like to see some more, then get you hands on this book:
by Joseph O’Connor and John Seymour.
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